My Love Affair with Food

Hey Steph,

I kind of have a thing for food. It goes back to my whole obsession with minutiae. It’s the tiny things in life that fill me with joy. I’m entering a new season: the era of full-time work. It is the first venture I’ve undertaken that has no foreseeable end. No graduation, no year-long internship. I have the daily grind, the 9-to-5 hustle, and working for retirement in my sights. I’ll admit. I’m not too excited about it. It’s not that I’m afraid of work; I’ve been working hard for the last 21 years of academia. But the monotony of a neverending job seems overbearing, and I haven’t even begun yet. That’s where the power of food comes in.

         Historically, our ancestors literally worked to live. It was their hands driving the plows. It was long hot days of working the fields and feeding the livestock. It was monotony. It was mentally-simple tasks repeated over and over.
        The pay-off: harvest.

Sometimes harvest occurs deep in the middle of the woods, "huckleberrying" with your awesome grandpa and cute little "Bug."

        We modern Americans have lost the emotional meaning of this word. Oranges, potatoes, carrots, bananas, lettuce, apples, and many other fruits and vegetables can be bought at your neighborhood grocery store all year round without breaking the bank. There they sit, your produce, in industrial-made plastic stands far removed from the good earth they came from.

        But for our ancestors, harvest was the joy-inspiring prize at the end of the months and months of work. Harvest was literally the fruit of their labors. Harvest was peace after days filled with worrisome prayers for rain. Harvest comes only with right number of frost hours and a kind, steady spring to welcome in the blossoms.

        We just don’t and can’t understand the emotional release that comes with a good harvest. But maybe we can take back a little more pleasure in food. In the past couple of years, I’ve read two books—In Defense of Food and The Omnivore’s Dilemma. I highly recommend both. They have given me a thoughtfulness with food that I didn’t have before. It is not an unusual experience for me to be holding back squeals of delight when I sit down to a good meal. For me, a good meal looks a lot like what those harvest-earning ancestors ate: it’s fresh vegetables and fruit. It’s homemade bread. It’s delicious meat.

         Though whatever career I undertake will be far from the fields and orchards and grasslands where my food comes from, a bit of reflection at eating can help to remove the “middle man” of my sterile office space and put me back kneeling on the soil with dirty hands and sweaty brow, holding the fruits of my labors; those hours of staring down the computer screen were the tilling of the soil that brought me this heirloom tomato or that juicy peach. In a small way, through thoughtfully eating, I can mentally step back into the shoes of my ancestors and reclaim the gift of the harvest. And that makes work a little more palatable.

Wishing you good eats,

Amanda

Ad usum: The Best Graduation Speech Ever

I've got a lot of siblings. They have a lot of degrees. I've been to a lot of graduations.

But the best graduation speech I've ever heard, I heard last week ('cause Amanda is a rockstar). And when I say the best, I mean--like if I did tattoos--I'd get a tattoo for this speech.

I loved it because it wasn't pure ego-stroke, like most graduation speeches. He acknowledged the efforts of the graduates, but he also drew attention to their luck. Yes, they had succeeded at an opportunity at education, but many others would've succeeded had they also been given the chance. And they had seized their opportunity, but like God and Spider-man remind us all, there's also something required of us for doing so.  (FYI, he didn't say that last bit, that's just what I heard)

He then talked about the idea of "possessing a degree" in the light of religious poverty. Monks are taught to write "ad usum" in each of their books and in every article of clothing. "Ad usum" means "for use"--they did not own their books, their toothbrushes, their shirts. They were given them to use, but they did not own them.

I'd rock that tattoo 

They were being trained that we all live at the mercy of Providence, even extending to their earthly possessions. Nothing was truly theirs to abuse or cherish as they willed,  because nothing is really "ours" for any of us. We all live day to day, breath to breath, unable to demand, or give away, even one more.

The opportunity to learn for any one of us has been gifted to us by circumstance, fate, or God. And it is  just one constellation in a universe of gifts. Our education is not a possession to be hoarded, guarded and prized, but our education is a gift to be used--"ad usum."

Unfortunately, that's all I remember of the excellent speech, and pretty much the entire ceremony. Well...that's not quite true. I also remembered that there's a member of the Humanities faculty that apparently received her doctorate from Beauxbatons.

 I mean, who could forget something that cool?

But I just thought the bits I do remember were so lovely, that I wanted to share it, even if I couldn't remember much. We are not the owners of our circumstances, but the stewards.

-Stephanie

Freezer Cooking: 13+ Meals with 4 Hours and $100

$100+ 4 Hours + 5 Dishes in my sink after the dishwasher was loaded+ 6 Recipes= No Dinnertime stress for WEEKS

I'll be honest, the minute I finished my first time freezer cooking night I thought, "I'm never doing that again." My back and legs ached from standing so long, and since I wanted to cook without my little buddy, I started post-bedtime, and thus didn't get to sleep until 1.  

BUT Three days later I was completely convinced that I would do freezer cooking for the rest of my life. I haven't had to worry about dinner once in two weeks. It's like being on vacation. And I still have 3/4 of my freezer stash left.  Having dinner taken care of, means I have time to slice up fresh fruit or make a salad to go with dinner. Heck, I even had time to clear off the whole dinner table and not just the half we use. 

And since I could get a better deal on a month's worth of meat and huge cans of tomato paste, it really loosened up my weekly grocery budget for berries, melons, and other tasty, healthy things that are usually beyond me. The entire shopping list for the 13+ meals only cost me $96.60 before tax. That's less than $8 per meal-- meals that includes sausage and beef. Crazy business.

Looking around for Freezer cooking recipes, I found a lot of things loaded down with cream cheese, and other questionably-healthy things that lacked vegetables. So there's no sour cream, egg-y casseroles (you're welcome Amanda) or cream of anything in this post. Every meal contains at least a full-serving of veggies, and most have much more than that. And they all cleared the taste tests with my panel of judges: Picky Toddler and Dubious Dad.

And because casseroles get old and aren't always convenient, I mixed in dishes that can be heated up in individual portions. So I've got homemade meals for even those mad dashes between school and meetings.

So what are we eating?

Jamie Oliver-inspired Ragout, Lasagna Napoletano, Italian Bean and Sausage Soup, Corn-Salsa Pasta Shell Tacos, Awesome Bean Burritos, and Shepherd's Pie

​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Click here to print the shopping list and instructions.

Remember Sharing is caring!

(I can't photograph food, so I used the picture of Fat and Happy's beautiful campanelle pasta in my collage)

MASTER SHOPPING LIST

2 carrots

2 sticks of celery

4 fresh chilies

1 large jalapenos

5 onions

2 red bell peppers

8-10 potatoes (russet or Yukon gold)

18-19 (or 4ish lbs.) large Italian sausages

3lbs. ground beef

2 boxes jumbo shells

2 boxes penne or similar pasta (I prefer to use campanelle, a ruffle-y pasta, just for looks)

2 28oz. cans  crushed tomatoes

4 cans fire-roasted tomatoes (or regular diced tomatoes)

1 box lasagna noodles

2  12oz. cans of tomato paste

1  29oz cans of tomato sauce

2 cans black beans

2 cans chickpeas

1 can pinto beans

6 cans Cannellini/ White Northern beans

1 jar artichoke hearts (...try not to sing a Christina Perri song in public ;)

1 jar minced garlic

12 cups Chicken Broth

2 cans condensed tomato soup

1 jar corn salsa

1 packet Taco Seasoning Mix

1 can enchilada sauce (optional)

18 Flour Tortillas

2 eggs

32 oz. of full-fat small curd cottage cheese or Ricotta

1.5 c. plain yogurt

1.5 lbs Mozzarella

3 cups  parmesan

1 bag shredded cheese (colby, cheddar, something yellow)

1 package frozen spinach

1 package frozen frenched green beans

I’m Assuming You Already Have

oregano

sage

red pepper flakes

ground mustard

Fennel Seeds (worth buying if you don’t have it, just trust me)

a tablespoon brown sugar/molasses

a cup of milk and a dab of butter

4  9x13 pans or you’ll need to buy some of the disposable dishes

4 mixing bowls (beg or borrow)

A food processor (beg or borrow---it’s just for one night after all, and this will be pure misery without one)

some tuna cans or canned cat food, or alphabet blocks or some other uniformly short   objects to use as spacers to stack and freeze cookie sheets

Okay...Ready?

Pour yourself a glass of water, lace up your cushiest tennis shoes, and put on an Audiobook. Let’s do this!

1.In a large mixing bowl dump in pasta shells, sprinkle generously with salt, and cover with water. Leave on counter.

2. Brown ground beef in 1 lb batches.  Put each of first two batches into it’s own 9x13 pan. Place last batch of ground beef in a large mixing bowl.

3. In the largest pot you own, combine tomato sauce, paste, and crushed tomatoes, 1 TB Brown sugar or molasses, 1 cup water, and 1 tsp each sage, oregano, and red pepper flakes. Cover and put over medium-low heat. (We’ll reference this mixture is as Tomato Sauce from now on)

4. Peel and hack onions into chunks. Pulse in food processor in batches until its all been diced---set aside.

5. Hack carrots, celery, and chiles roughly then  whizz in food processor with 2 tsp oregano and 1-2 TB fennel seed, and 2 large spoonfuls of the minced garlic. You’ll probably need to work in batches. Mix together in a large bowl

6.Remove the casings from all the sausage. Drop ¼ of sausage in Carrot mixture and combine (squishing between fingers is easily the fastest way to do this). Divide sausage/carrot mixture between 2 freezer bags, and put in freezer. Yeehaw, give yourself a fist pump. 1 down. 5 to go.

7. Brown the rest of the sausage in three batches in skillet.

8.  Add first batch of browned sausage along with a package of frozen spinach into tomato sauce pot. Reduce heat to low (because you are going to forget to stir it and we don’t want a burnt on mess at the bottom of the pot).

9. Set the next two batches of browned sausage aside to cool.

10. Fill a 9x13 with a couple inches of water, sprinkle with salt, and lay in lasagna noodles. Set aside.

11. To bowl of browned beef, add taco seasoning,  ½ jar of corn salsa, drained can of pinto beans and 1.5 cups of yogurt. Stir to combine.

12. Grease two cookie sheets. Check on your shells. They should be just a barely on the crunchy side of al dente.

13. Spoon taco mixture into individual shells and place on cookie sheet. They’re going to touch, there’s not avoiding it--but try to keep clusters to only 2-3 shells with spaces in between. Place tuna cans in corners of one cookie sheet so you can stack the second on top.

14. Place cookie sheets in freezer. Another fist pump! (You’re not quite finished with that, but you need a victory at this point). 2 Down, 4 Left.

15. To your  pans of browned beef add a ½ tsp ground mustard, frozen green beans, a can of tomato soup (do NOT add water), a spoonful of minced garlic and a cup of diced onions each. Mix. Adding a liberal dose of Worchestershire sauce would be a really good idea, if you like that sort of thing.

16. In new bowl combine cottage cheese/Ricotta with 2 eggs

17. Fish out your lasagna noodles (it’s okay if they’re still a bit firm) and dump out the water from pan. Ladle a scoop of Tomato Sauce into the bottom of each of two  9x13’s.  

18. Lay noodles across the bottom of each pan. Cover each pan with ¼ of the ricotta mixture in each pan. Top with a ¼ of the Tomato Sauce, and a ¼ of the Mozzerella shreds. Repeat this step again.

19. Apply a layer of Parmesan and Cover with Foil.

20. PLACE YOUR LASAGNA IN THE FREEZER, You Domestic Rockstar!

21. If your shells are frozen hard, take out cookie sheets and bag your shells in freezer bags and put back in freezer. 3 Down!!! It’s all downhill from here, I promise

22. Peel and hack potatoes, and put in the now empty sauce pot-- don’t bother cleaning the pot past a little rinse--it’s just bonus flavor for the potatoes.  Cover with water and place over medium-high heat. Add some salt.  

23. In batches, send 4 drained cans of Cannellini beans through the food processor until a paste.  Put 1 can in each of two freezer bags, and add the other 2 cans to the jalepeno/artichoke bowl.

24. Okay, now process drained chickpeas and black beans in batches and add to artichoke bowl. Keep it chunky. The first time I made a big batch of this I got a little too puree-happy and then had to strain the resulting soupy mess through a cheesecloth. ¡No bueno!

25. Add 1 cup diced onion to the bean party and mix thoroughly.

26.  Lay out tortillas on your cookie sheets. Ladle out bean mixture into middle of each tortilla (less is more!) And roll those burritos. Squeeze burritos onto one cookie sheet and put in freeze. Whew, you’re almost done. Hold in there!

27. Split cooled sausage among the 2 Cannelini bags.

28. Add a spoonful of garlic to sausage bags along with another  can of drained, unprocessed Cannellini beans, and a can of diced tomatoes each, then split remaining diced onions between two bags

29. Deposit in your own personal food bank--Just 1 Left!

30. Drain potatoes and mash with some milk (and butter if you’d like) keep the potatoes on the thick side, thank you.

31. Top each ground beef 9x13 with mashed potatoes, and cover with foil. Stash in the freezer, because you are a freaking rock star.

32. When burritos are frozen hard remove from cookie sheet and transfer to freezer bags and place back in Freezer--may need up to an hour- but go ahead and leave them overnight because....

YOU DID IT!!!!!!

To eat your goodies:

Lasagna Napoletano--No need to thaw. Cook covered at 375 degrees for 1 hour 15 minutes. Remove cover and bake 20 more minutes or until cheese is bubbly and starting to brown (Adapted from John Chandler)

Corn-Salsa Pasta Shell Tacos-- For a snack or single serving--Place a few frozen shells on a plate and microwave for 4 minutes .  OR cover bottom of 9x13 with a ¼ inch of salsa and drop in enough tacos to fill pan. Bake, covered, for 45 minutes at 350, cover with shredded cheese bake 15 more minutes and serve. (can't find the original, but altered from on one of the million identical pasta-shell tacos on Pinterest)

Italian Bean and Sausage Soup-- Drop frozen bean/sausage mix into large pot, cover with 6 cups chicken stock and bring to a boil, simmer for 4 minutes. Remove from heat and drop in a bag of fresh spinach or baby kale. Serve. (adapted from a recipe card from HEB)

Jamie Oliver-Inspired Ragout-- Defrost carrot/sausage mixture in fridge overnight.  Cook penne pasta according to package, don’t rinse or drain too well, you want the pasta to be wet. In skillet brown sausage, then add 1 can fire-roasted tomatoes cooking until tomatoes are hot. Combine with pasta, and Serve. Top with sliced green onions if you remember. (Adapted from Jamie Oliver)

Awesome Burritos/Enchiladas--- For single serving-- heat in microwave for 4 minutes. For Dinner-- Spread a little canned enchilada sauce on bottom of 9x13, lay out frozen burritos in a row, top with more enchilada sauce--Cover with foil and cook in a 350 degree oven for 50 minutes (25 minutes if already thawed), Uncover, sprinkle cheese and cook until cheese is melted -- about 10 minutes. (Altered beyond recognition but loosely based on a recipe by Guy Fieri)

Shepherd’s Pie-- No need to thaw. Cook covered at 350 degrees for 1 hour 15 minutes. Remove cover and sprinkle with shredded cheese of your choice and bake for 15 more minutes (Family Recipe)

Lots of Love, 
Stephanie

Thoughts on Birthday Sadness

I'm a lyric junkie. That high school assignment where you wrote an essay about a song, was perhaps the one enjoyable essay I ever wrote. I picked Josh Groban’s “Now or Never"-- It’s a song about a relationship in crisis. And at 17, I had never been in an actual relationship....so, I don't really know why I was so drawn to the song.

For whatever reason, I found the imagery really compelling (still do). I kind of have a thing for on-the-brink relationship songs: "Pills" by The Perishers, "Poison and Wine" by The Civil Wars.  The lyrics in all three of these songs are absolutely stunning. I dunno, I guess I’m drawn to the bravery of acknowledging a failure and fighting for your relationship-- when the one you fight is yourself. At least that’s my take. The endings are kind of ambiguous. You can't tell whether they stay together or not, but in my mind they always make it.

Recently, it's my relationship with optimism that's on the ropes. I find myself listening to "24" by Switchfoot over and over again. Not coincidentally, I turned one score and four this past week. The plans, work, victories, rejections all seemed to culminate in one moment of birthday anticlimax that this song captures perfectly. “Life is not what I thought it’d be, twenty-four hours ago.” It's the anthem of my age. The opportunities that didn’t arise, the resolutions that floundered. The things I haven't conquered yet. "Twenty-four failures in twenty-four tries." At 24, I've had enough years of adulthood to know that I'm not nearly as good at saving myself as I had thought.

"Jacob Wrestles the Angel" By Gustav Dore

“I wrestled the angel for more than a name.”-- Like Jacob in the bible, I seek for more than recognition. The angel renamed Jacob,  Israel-- Hebrew for "wrestles with God"-- to signify his struggle. But even then, Jacob wouldn’t give up the fight. He hadn't obtained the goal of that struggle. He continued to strive until he received his blessing. I need to achieve what I've set my mind to, and that is the source of my ruminations.

It turns out birthday sadness isn't about mortality or aging, at least not for me. Birthday sadness is my maturity asserting itself. I can't be pleased about myself for merely existing the way I could as a kid. I ate, slept, breathed for another three hundred days--bake me a cake. 

I have to actually do stuff to be proud of myself now.

It's not that I don't have people to recognize me, because I have so many wonderful people cheering me on. It's the goals themselves that allude me. Finished with school, I've ran out of graders and external benchmarks. I'm left to dream up my own measures and my own bars to clear. ...I'm at the mercy of my own opinion of myself.

And that's why birthday sadness is a thing.

But like I said, I always assume they make it. My optimism was only briefly dead. Ressurrected. "I am the second man now." And straight happy-go-lucky has been replaced with an informed optimism. Failures always accompany success, and that's just the way of things. There aren't periods where good and bad are neatly divided. The fabric of life isn't striped, it's marbled--the good and bad happen concurrently.

So no more waiting. There won't be a time when I'm less busy or more resilient. Less scared or more prepared. For most things in life, preparation comes with the doing of a thing and not in the analysis.

So here's to 24. I'm looking forward to the "symphony in 24 parts"  and with more than a casual request for the spirit to lift me up where I fall short.

-Stephanie